


Gooey Dies in a Car Crash

by NullBubby



Series: Gooey Dies.zip [4]
Category: Kirby (Video Games)
Genre: gooey friccin dies, kid taranza, lil shady creature hiding out in alleys for some reason, referenced appetite
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:28:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25024690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NullBubby/pseuds/NullBubby
Summary: Gooey dies yet again.
Series: Gooey Dies.zip [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743142
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Gooey Dies in a Car Crash

Company? Check.

Appetite? Never elsewhere.

Lunch? About time, really.

The three attributes to suit anyone’s perfect day, no matter how miniscule or abnormal any element may appear. Sure, others could be very rude if they wanted, but they were still fun to be around nonetheless. Or it could be that hunger wasn’t quite cooperating correctly, and simply refused to let anything in, else it’d throw a fit, though it simply wasn’t in control. But the most important aspect, the food itself, didn’t exactly have any noticeable drawbacks or hindrances attached to itself. Edibles were edibles, and sure, some didn’t taste as good as others, but that didn’t mean they were bad in any sort of way. One could simply take the advice from a certain absentminded blob, and he’d no doubt enjoy another’s presence.

Of course, not everyone was a blue, squishy blob, and didn’t have tongues that could reach up and scratch their own head should they choose to. That didn’t appear to be the case in his vision, though, and he perceived everyone as needful of something tasty at all times, be it any old passerby or even boulders. He did have to admit, and no matter how impolite he may have been coming across as, those rocks were quite delicious. They were no doubt simply trying to live their own lives in peace and solitude, attempting to take a nice nap after such a long time of the sun beating down on them, though they were just so tasty that he couldn’t help himself.

Today, though, he was going to be a reformed blob. There would be no consumption of any rocks or innocent bystanders, and he would make the effort to resist eating anything “that crazed goo creature” would never dare pass by the opportunity of. That meant leaving behind several of the most exquisite meals he could possibly find, though he at least managed to make a tradeoff for some company, almost as good. Sure, they weren’t edible—or at least, willing to be—but it was always nice to be around some friends, even if they didn’t feel like devouring everything in sight. Speaking of, it was probably best to get back to them, as he didn’t want to come off as rude with the others.

Apparently, in the five or so seconds his mind had wandered off for, the others hadn’t budged from their relative position, which was honestly quite a surprise. He’d spent an entire eternity staring off blankly at probably no wall in particular, yet they still waited until he was finished to start doing anything, how polite. He’d truly lucked out in finding such nice fellows like the ones beside him, and he really hoped they all felt the same way about himself.

“How’dya open this?” Marx grumbled, fidgeting around with some jingly trinkets against a much larger machine. He’d been attempting it since last his own mind at least somewhat in control, which had to have been at least ten seconds ago. How he managed to attain such an attention span with the task of unlocking that auto-thingy was beyond one blob’s capabilities to decipher.

The other two—give or take one inattentive blue blob—didn’t appear too interested in assisting, instead watching the show unfold as the jester continued struggling onward with every single possible method of inserting a key into a keyhole. One was completely disinterested primarily because he somewhat suffered the same fate as his gooey companion, staring away blankly without clear direction as to what he was supposed to be doing. He had a lot of hands, far too many for anyone to count within a reasonable time frame, though the very least that could be understood by even the most complex minds of blobs such as himself was that all were being twiddled against each other, attempting to find some way or another to pass the time. With all three pairs, quite clearly visible to anyone but a blob such as himself to bother to notice.

The last of their small party had hair quite similar in color to himself, only a slight change in tone being the noticeable difference between the two hues. It wasn’t easy to even see himself, though he just knew regardless. She was more so unresponsive to the situation as a result of boredom, it appeared. A soft sigh emerged, as had a few times already, yet she still made no move to help, regardless of how quickly it’d resolve the situation at hand. Leaning against their transport uninterestedly, she occasionally gave the other unoccupied two a glance in irritation.

Actually, now that he had some time to notice, everyone that had come was wearing some form of headgear, be it something that looked simply delicious like the spider boy’s, or something easily recognizable, like their prankster’s. That wasn’t to say it wouldn’t be delicious anyway, though he’d just prefer a different hat if forced to choose only one. In regards to his own, he had come as far prepared as him and his mind could imagine being—a classic, bland cap, resting lopsided atop his head. Sure, they weren’t the most classy, though he decided that wasn’t necessary with such a situation like the one they were venturing out on. And they were handy, too. Nothing like the good phrase “safety first” when paying attention to attire. Or was it “dress for the occasion”? One of those, he was always getting them mixed up.

One last time, the keyring bounced, and Marx decided he’d had enough. With a highly exaggerated groan, he turned back to the other three in preparation to give up his task in favor of a much simpler one so he could watch someone else struggle with the car for a while.

“‘Ay, uh...” Bobbing stepped to auditory position. “Tooth!”

The spider boy looked up shyly, not appearing to have any sort of idea or preference to the next few words spoken his way. Maybe he was hungry, too, and he was hoping he’d be offered some food. Actually, he himself actually wanted something so badly that he was drooling without even realizing, despite what’d been promised to himself earlier in the day.

“You... do something with this.”

Without being given any sort of warning or time to react, the shiny objects bounced against the ground, sliding a short distance before stopping just beneath his body. The boy simply stared at it awkwardly, making no impressions that he was going to do anything with the keys any time soon. The other three quickly followed their glances, each with different inquiries about someone’s next move, such as if someone was going to eat it or not. It was perfectly good food after all, best not to let it go to waste.

Francisca let out another long-winded exhale and turned to the only other maybe decently mature one of the group, likely considering whether she was truly acting as more of a friend or babysitter for three in her current situation. For a moment, it seemed as if she’d take the situation into her own hands and get them all going, finally, though no move was made in the end.

“Go ahead!”

Tooth turned down nervously and let out a soft whimper, too nervous to even drop any of his hands from just below his head. Maybe he was hungry?

At last, it seemed she’d finally taken enough, and Francisca took her stand just before Marx, blocking the view between him and the two others. They couldn’t truly tell, one for more obvious reasons, but it appeared an awful lot like she was finally fed up with the jester’s remarks and jokes for once, which, even for herself, was saying quite a lot. In regards to how the others had known her, at least.

“Could you leave the poor boy alone just this once? He obviously has no clue what was even tossed in front of him, yet you’re still expecting him to figure out a solution to whatever you were far too lazy to accomplish yourself?”

“I mean, sure. ‘Bout the whole—”

“And your stubbornness, too,” she cut him off sternly. “Leave it behind, just this once, okay?”

Before being given a chance to respond, she started toward the completely bewildered boy, having not moved a smidge from his original position. Marx grumbled something odd, and, despite obviously hearing exactly what was said, judging by her face, she made no move to provide necessary retribution for how annoying he could turn out to be at times. Some food really ought to set everyone back in place. It was no fun when friends were arguing, but food was always something that settled problems of all sorts—boredom, sadness, anger, whatever.

Two disembodied hands surrounded Tooth in a soft hug without allowing any sort of preparation beforehand, though he looked grateful for it nevertheless. Upon being shortly let go, the two locked eyes, the shorter one only possibly as a result of the shadow cast over himself by the figure directly ahead.

“He didn’t mean anything by it,” she assured him in a mellow voice.

Marx looked eager to barge into the conversation with an irritating remark of his own, though he somehow managed to restrict himself beyond a soft tapping of his foot. He liked music, then? It sounded nice, maybe the two could work together with a little licking of his own to bring to the table.

“Please step aside, I’ll take it from here.”

He immediately obeyed, taking his place just beside the blue blob without truly noticing. Of course, one took it as a sign of affection between the two, though he didn’t decide to return it just yet. A promise was a promise, and at the very least, he wasn’t going to be scaring anyone today. If someone else frightened him, though, that’d be alright. Just a little fun between the two, that’d be all.

As to be expected, he immediately lost interest in the ongoing situation and gave up his attention to yet another blank wall just beside him. Oh, and an alleyway as well, can’t forget that. It’d be rude to completely ignore its existence, for one, and it also appeared to have a friend residing within the darkness between two conveniently placed buildings. Convenient solely because they were simply there in the first place, in his mind. Hmm... maybe the others wouldn’t mind if he went out to find a new friend.

None noticed his quick departure as he bounced out toward the strip of darkness against the regularly bright and somewhat colorful landscape that composed the small town all stood in at the moment. Maybe whoever was standing in the darkness was just a little shy, but he wanted to show that he wouldn’t bite. Unless they asked for it, then sure, he’d give them a good lick if they wanted. Otherwise, he was sticking to his original plan for the day and performing the absolute best possible for any blob to ever dream of proceeding, and that sadly meant not turning into a devourer of all varieties of living and static beings.

Despite how dark it was, he simply treated it as if he’d never left the sidewalk just moments ago, and bounded along without worry or otherwise issue. Sure, there were some badly organized bags of snacks along the ground, though he wasn’t to judge the individual who set them about. Actually, if he learnt of who did it, he’d be sure to give the best compliment he could muster up—a lick, probably, unless he was feeling more of a tackling mood at the moment.

A short distance down, he met the culprit that cast the slightest shape over the deep darkness of a few paces down from the street. He had to admit, they were quite on the odder side of creatures he’d ever met, though he wasn’t going to be taunting them about it, or pointing their build in general out at all, of course. It wouldn’t be fair to be treating them any different from himself, really. Their two wheel-looking things, rotating ever so slowly with the image of several bright lights against a dark background... a space enthusiast? Sure, he didn’t get how two floating cogs were able to observe the universe, though he’d seen enough odd entities in his lifespan, including himself, that there had to be some method he couldn’t come up with to taking a gaze up at the sky. Probably eyes. Those things were pretty good at seeing stuff.

He promptly let out a greeting, in his nature simply a short bound and stretch of the tongue, but a greeting nonetheless. There happened to be no response at first, so it probably turned out that they were quite the timid one. That’d be alright, though, as he’d met a few of his own before—maybe, he couldn’t remember all too well—so he’d find some way to make a friendly conversation without providing any discomfort. That’s what it took to be a good friend, and he was sure going to take that role for the lonely stranger in front of himself.

Once more, he let a few drops of slobber rain a short distance ahead, splashing lightly just beneath the odd figure of about twice his size. There was still no response, and it was beginning to seem as if they were either truly reluctant to get a word out, or that they were hungry. It seemed more on the latter side, judging by how slowly their gears were turning, so the least he could do was find something to eat for them. The nice thing to do.

With a quick wave of the tongue, he turned around and stumbled over one of the bags of snacks on the ground. Large and squishy, it was quite enough to send him topping over on his face, also to let him know how tasty the ground truly was at times. Boy, he was so eager to get in a lick on the surface beneath himself, taste all that dark stuff plastered over it all, but he still couldn’t break the promise he’d made. However, those bags, though... those was something he could use.

Upon picking himself back up, a new figure appeared at the end of the alley, maybe a couple of bounces ahead. Despite how painfully obvious her attire and blue hair made it to uncover who it was beneath the nonexistent shadows, he realized there was an important task at hand, and someone was certainly in need of some food. Without any acknowledgement that he’d noticed even the slightest movement at the alley’s opening, he turned around and weaved his tongue around the first trash bag, struggling to find a good grip on it over all the spilling goods inside.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t complete the job in time for his intended result before a hand snagged a portion of his squishy body, dragging him back as he was left to simply stare at the complete emptiness just ahead. Oh well, then. They happened to start out for some food themselves, and that was alright. Something to make themselves happy, and that was a good thing.

“Gooey, now isn’t the time for this.”

The words merely appeared to him as a few illusive sounds as he continued to dream up all the fun times the two of them could have had had he been given some time to finish the job. Eating, chatting, playing, eating, everything else, but not everything he wanted was going to be given to him. Easily, at least, as there was still time later on to find his new playmate.

Marx stood proudly in front of the opened door, posing arrogantly for the only member of their group left behind. If the smug lean against it wasn’t enough to complete his obvious goal of showing off, his expression forcefully stole the lead and took pride in finishing the race for the rest of him, which, in his own composure, decided to provide gratitude for such an irritating attitude being expressed.

“Where’d he run off to this time?” he asked, more as a complaint than anything.

There left no response as the grip over himself was let go. It was quite obvious how much her own attitude had lost all dwindling patience that remained with the group as a whole—save for Tooth, of course—but whatever Marx’s mind ran off of was far too selfish to allow much of anything but arrogance and disdain to roam free within his mindset, so it was simply impossible for him to perceive.

In a few moments, Marx was cornered against the incurve between the door and the rest of the odd, wheeled machine that sat in front of them all. Of course, he could probably walk off to the side if he wanted, or simply close the door to get by, though he decided to stay put, for once. Or maybe he was too intensely focused on what he was going to eat later on. Who knew? Not one blob for certain, but it’d be fun to try to come up with possible explanations.

“Oh, looks like we got a little bitta’ action prepped up now, hmm?”

A sigh came, though it appeared that both at least somewhat content with paying attention to the current situation had already lost interest. Talking was boring when he wasn’t in it, but he didn’t want to interrupt their fun. There did happen to be someone completely unoccupied right beside him, though he didn’t feel the need to get anything going between the two, despite what his regulated state would have insisted. After all, there was one large hunk of metal and whatever other tasty goods that made up those machine things just in front of him, and he could hear it begging his name, pleading for him to hop in and give it all a lick, even over the increasing volume of the conversation. At the very least, he hoped there wouldn’t be any competition should he attempt to start for a new record, as, whatever that was, it’d be a huge waste not to completely devour it.

Maybe Marx noticed, maybe he didn’t, but he was of course utterly useless in preventing whatever disastrous outcome possible from one blob’s absentmindedness. The door was open, two seats—not one, but two, for some reason—waiting for him just inside. He could already taste the nonexistent scent it provided, completely blocking out any physical sense he had left to perceive the roughness of the sidewalk and the soft tap against his back. It wouldn’t have meant anything even had his mind not been completely drawn in by the feast he really shouldn’t have been striving for, as, at the very best, he’d have merely given a confused look to the boy behind himself before continuing forward.

A short hop inside, and it appeared that no one was willing to stop his snack time. Two were still arguing outside, and the last was staring down awkwardly, too shy to let the others know of the impending doom approaching them momentarily—within a minute or so at very best. Not quite on par with those celestial creatures invading the planet a couple of times, but enough to injure at least a few dozen or so innocent bystanders, if all the pillars’ fragments were aligned to set the outcome just right. Oh boy, so much to consume within moments, just what to start on...

Without much of any other idea as to where to begin, he waved his tongue around, dangling it from the roof a few times to let everything know that his sense of taste was arriving to them all. It all felt and tasted quite odd—not particularly bad, but merely odd. Not quite like anything he’d ever experienced in the past, but he was quite glad to have the new sensation locked within his memories. It was all actually on the upper rankings of deliciousness, even rivaling some of his regular treats in terms of pure taste. And... just so, so much of it, all around, it was sure to be one of the best buffets he’d ever cram into his mouth.

Before that, though, he needed to finish up with the taste testing to know if anything should be avoided. That wheel-looking thing just ahead? A quick spin of it against his tongue revealed that it was bearable, and nothing more, so probably first up. That little stick just to the side? Eh, about the same, nothing groundbreaking. Ooh, how about those buttons a short distance down? Tasting it all, and... it was a little better, overall. Maybe it’d work well as the appetizer.

Off to the side, something slammed shut as a beep sounded throughout the entire vehicle, officially beginning his course to victory and pure satisfaction of consuming everything. What’d he been thinking that morning, promising not to start wolfing down the first thing in sight? Where was the fun in that? That was the plan and strategy at the start of every day, but if two outside didn’t like that, then fine. They were shouting, banging on what looked like nothing in begging him to allow them to join in on the meal, but the closing time had already arrived, and it was a feast solely to himself. Alright, with everything taste tested and ready to go, it was about time to start on the actual eating portion of his time, and what better place to start than the low buttons?

The first button was a little tricky to maneuver a long tongue around, solely for the fact of the lacking space down below. As a solution, he turned his body upside down to accommodate, which actually did the trick quite well. One moment later, and the entire block was broken off and sent into his mouth, never to come off as anything more than a snack for some squishy blob’s endless stomach. It turned out to be about as he’d expected it to be, just maybe with a little extra “spice” added in from his licking session just a moment ago.

Next up was the second button, but the others wanted in so much that they were banging even harder against the walls of the machine. Was it really necessary to explain to them that if they wanted the food, they needed to come earlier, and prepared, at that? That wouldn’t be stopping him, though, as the next block was already down his mouth, a little more effort required to set it free than the last. Actually, now that he thought about it, he was being quite selfish in letting the food all to himself, and he’d be a terrible friend not to share. He’d already riled up himself to get everything down his bottomless void of a stomach—even getting the entire ground rumbling, at that—but it truly wasn’t fair to let such an enormous buffet in the sole responsibility of himself.

With some effort, he picked himself back upright and stared off to the side where the others had stood just a moment ago, though they were nowhere to be found. What was left of them was instead a rapidly speeding by landscape, sending the other three far behind as they stared in disbelief at the actions of their blob companion, speeding off without them. Or were they more attentive to where the machine he was on was going? Hmm... maybe it knew what he was after? He hadn’t told it, of course, but it’d be awfully considerate for it to assist his needs. So then, what lay ahead, just out the front of the vehicle?

A wall, of all things, and quite speedily approaching. Within a few moments, it’d collide with the contraption he sat in, but that meant something big was in store, not just for himself, but the entire group. As soon as he was there, he’d make sure to be a considerate being, letting the others know that he really wasn’t just a selfish monster that hogged all the food to himself.

Just ahead was the perfect meal, sitting dormant for him to demolish in mere moments. Actually, not just himself, but for everyone. The entirety of it, bricks, layering, and all, and that didn’t even include the car. Oh... oh boy, he could hardly wait.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a perfectly good reason as to why I'm referring to Spider Boy as Tooth.
> 
> I just won't explain it here.


End file.
